Do you ever wonder why you tend to get stuck, even when what you want is a wonderful goal? What's that invisible "thing" that gets in the way of what you say you want?
This topic comes up repeatedly in our coaching practice. People have dreams, goals and ideas, and yet, as soon as they decide to go for it, something happens: procrastination, distractions, Facebook, TV, alcohol, you name it.
We're all so good at that!
Why? If it's what we want (whatever it is) why is it so elusive and sometimes challenging to even get started?
If you ever wonder:
What's getting in my way of being more successful?
You're not alone.
Do you want to know how to achieve anything you want? Keep reading...
So, what's getting in the way...
... of your dreams, sitting at your computer to write, starting or completing important projects, committing to a new nutritional plan?
Ready for the answer?
Ummm.... YOU are.
We know. Not what you wanted to hear.
It's not your fault! Stick with us for another minute, because once you realize what that "thing" is, you'll be able to break through it!
We'll tell you what it's not: it's not the economy. Or the competition. Or the political climate. Or your lack of computer knowledge. Or the algorithms on Facebook.
What it is, is... "resistance," inside those three inches above your eyebrows.
(For some of us it's more like five inches, and it keeps getting bigger every year :-(
Does any of this sound familiar?
1. You get a great idea, dream, or plan: finish your novel, start a new business, eat healthier, get your finances in order, start dating or publish a website.
2. Within a few seconds, your mind gets a massive hit of resistance and you find super creative ways to talk yourself out of it:
I'm too old / I'm too young
It's too late / It's too soon
Everybody else is so much further ahead than I am
I need to think about this for a while longer
I don't want to look foolish
I need to save money first / I need to get out of debt first
I don't know how ___________ (social media, FB ads, etc.) works
I don't wanna go into the next tax bracket
What's wrong with what I'm doing now? I'm fine.
I don't like vegetables.
What will my family think?
3. Most of this happens under the radar, on autopilot. And, if you DO notice what you're doing, then you beat yourself up in some way for not doing what you wanted to do.
4. And the next day? Lather, rinse, repeat.
And this habit of talking ourselves OUT of what's important to us (instead of talking ourselves INTO it) is what's leading so many people to drink, lose sleep, get into debt, start wars (with ourselves, our spouses, and our neighbors) and worse.
It's NOT your fault!
Steven Pressfield, author of The War of Art (wonderful and recommended!) says: "Resistance is the most toxic force on the planet. It is the root of more unhappiness than poverty, disease, and erectile dysfunction."
A bit of levity, yet, oh so true. Resistance affects us all.
IMAGINE if you were to magically wake up tomorrow and have the gumption and courage to take action in the direction of your dreams?
Pressfield says the way to combat resistance is to become a Pro. Not as in a lawyer or doctor or football player. Pro as an ideal. As a commitment to yourself. "A professional loves it so much, he dedicates his life to it."
What if you started asking yourself: "What would a pro do?" and do that! Step it up a notch. Resistance hates it when we turn pro.
Starting right now, you can decide. You can make that subtle shift in your mind and with one stroke, Bam! You get to take action each day in the direction of your dreams. As if you were a pro.
Start with ONE action. Even a baby step. Commit to it. And watch as life begins to unfold.
Of course, it's helpful to first know what your goals are. Fuzzy thinking creates fuzzy results. So become CLEAR. Dare to dream, and dream BIG.
You are on this planet to do something marvelous. If you listen, you'll hear a call. It's your muse saying: It's time.... let's do this wonderful thing we came here to do.
You can let go of the habits, beliefs, ideas, and mind games that are getting in your way.
If you need help figuring it out, for Pete's sake (who's Pete?) ask for help!
Never in the history of the world have there been so many tools at our disposal, so much knowledge, so much support to achieve our dreams!
GETTING CLEAR is a great place to start, and it'll open up some really valuable headspace and heart-space, allowing you to pursue what's really important to you.
If all that seems intimidating or overwhelming, we're here to be your cheer leading squad. Just ask, and we'll be happy to support you. That's what gets us up in the morning.
You deserve a great life! Learning to break through resistance is a life-changer. Just start with one... small... step... forward.
The good news is that the hard part is just starting. Once you begin, momentum builds, and soon you won't be able to tear yourself away. You just need to start.
Yes? Push through it, just the beginning. Then relish in the life force that comes through you in the creative process! There's nothing like it on Earth.
And now, please share IN THE COMMENTS BELOW: What's ONE small step you're willing to take today? Or, what's the one thing you're willing to LET GO OF?
Thanks for being brave!
Eli and Joseph